Heavy Heart

Heavy feeling at this very moment.

Although I am well prepare for the day, but to my surprise, i have a heavy feeling heading towards the day..

There are so many things on my burden that I heavily to let down.. People around me, buddies around me, work around me, and lots more..
I miss prettymuch things. But it is always difficult to make the first move. It really leave me with a lot of memories and lot of ups and downs. Tears that i have, laughter that i share, systems that had been work out properly, knowledge that given to me.. That i hope I will not leave behind.

After tomorrow, the countdown will start pretty fast.. and the real character of people will immediately appear and my feeling will be more and more mixed up.. And my days ahead are really unpredictable. It will be more challenge and more heavy for days to come..

I wish I can tell but unfortunately I cant.. This is not the way I like it to be but I need to follow the flow as it goes..

I hope the days ahead can be less challenge and easier for me to go thru...... Looking forward to end of the March..

I can be the real ME...

Not a fool again...

I ask myself once again... Am i a fool again...

Why should I?? Why me again??

I am tired.. Obviously I am... And I am so unlikely to be taken for granted once again.

People around me had been telling me, but i choose not to believe... and continue believe what u said is always true.
But again and again, I realize I had been a fool. I am upset.. REALLY upset.. I loook really stupid.. I am feeling so dumb.

Someone came to me, telling that I am someone only believe what that person tell me no matter what others told me.., Agree I am.. And this someone told me that I am not a fool but i am just not as cunning as some poeple out there is.

Do i choose to be a fool or to be a cheeky person.??

Unfortunately, till now i still wanted to be a fool in trusting that person and finding excuses as this person is not so cunning and fake as what I believe she is...

Why should i be that dumb?? No idea.. but i just rather not believing the truth... It hurts......

Finally...

Battle Start... I cant reveal.. I cant be sincere.. I cant be what I am..

What will I be..... I have no idea....

I start to be tired although I have not start fighting.. but I am pretty confuse..

Confuse..confuse and more confuse...